Friday, October 28, 2011

What I should have said when I was 13.



I will not have time for you tomorrow,
choose today,
choose me or deny me,
but do it today.
I will be different tomorrow,
tomorrow I will not care,
I will not love you.

Love me, kiss me,
but do it today,
tomorrow I will not have time
for silly, childish love.
I will become a woman,
I will not bother.
Make up your mind,
this is your only chance.
The man that you will become
will not stand a chance with
fully grown me.
Tic-tac.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

No soy color sepia

No soy color sepia,
no soy siquiera blanco y negro,
soy de colores.
De rojos apasionantes
y de azules tristes,
de amarillos optimistas y
de grises depresivos,
de negros mortales.
Soy de morados pensativos,
de naranjas juveniles
y de verdes libertinos.
Mis colores cambian,
nunca se desvanecen,
mi alma no se decolora,
se redecora.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Malice


This is a story about a girl. A girl that could fool anyone. A girl who fooled me. Her non-treatening blonde hair and her confident hazel eyes give the impression that she is harmless. But in her thin delicate body she's hosting a monster inside. Something inside her snapped a long time ago. She wasn't always this rotten, she had friends, real friends and she felt a true smile, like the ones that come from within. She gave real hugs and she had this look, this "I have a great future ahead of me" look. Now her eyes can fool some of us, but if you look close enough you can see a light went off.
This is a story about a girl who used to spread joy and now has become an infectious disease that affects everyone that make her feel envious.The thing is, I never knew exactly why she targeted me. She never attacked me but she made sure to plant doubt in; every feeling, every decision, everyone. She slowly grew a garden of intrigue and contempt. I started to drink her poison and felt miserable. I should have known, she felt no empathy for my pain. I decided to distance myself from the world around me only to find out that it just her that I needed to be away from; she made me weak and powerless. I did not took it personal, every girl has a snake inside but we lock it, and if we really want it, we kill it. We; women, live in a competitive world and choices can make us the villan in a blink of an eye, and there is no room for mistakes in our world, we are quickly judged and senteced, there are no second chances. So me, been the inquisitive monster that I am, tried to track the source of the problem.
 I discovered a girl that fell in love with the wrong man, and he broke and continues to break her spirit until one day she gave up. This is what happens when hope fades and the future is fed with uncertainty until it turns into a thorn that hurts everyday. You can only endure so much until you become that pain, and pain is an addiction whether you cause it or you feel it. And now she is at the other end of the spectrum, causing the pain, feeding on somebody else's mistakes and tragedies. She does this with malice. I understand but I do not support her choices. I will not be her friend, but I will remain her acquaintance  to watch her and if I can, I will keep her away from everyone I love. It is my testimony that the only true smile that she can give right now is always holding a dark little secret.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Nostalgia maldita


Seguir en esta ciudad con el fantasma que vino y se fue pero que se aferró dentro de mí es una tortura contanste donde extrañar es el pan de cada día. Cada calle está poblada de recuedos y de suspiros de tiempos mejores. El viento cada vez más frío me susurra sus voces. Y si en algún momento estuvieron tan cerca ahora son sólo cortadas que arden en mi corazón y sobre todo en la soledad. Quiero otra ciudad, una nueva donde no haya ecos y cenizas o una vieja donde haya vida y libertad. Pido que no me duela, que cada día me duela menos recordar y añorar y desear otra vida, otro lugar, otra yo. Pido, rezo, imploro a quien me oiga que no sea el tedio el que me haga rendirme sino la misma vida frondosa de experiencias la que haga de mi nostalgia un fulminante olvido. Mientas pido mato mis lágrimas con vanalidades y duermo mi desesperanza con lo cotidiano. Y mi vida no es tan mala, es apacible y alegre, pero mi pasado es tan alto e impetuoso que deja caer su sombra y hace de mi presente oscuridad total. Todo sería más fácil si no se hubieran ido, si yo me hubiera quedado.